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Friday, January 25, 2013

Thoughts On Being Engaged After Dating For A (Really) Long Time


I've been thinking a lot about being engaged, and how it's changed and affected my relationship with Nadav in the most wonderful way. We've been dating a really long time, longer than most married couples we know have even been together. We're both okay with that because we started dating at a young age, and were long distance for so many years. I won't say that it has always been easy, but I am thankful that in many ways we've grown up together. Our love is so so strong, and now that we're engaged I can say that I've never felt so blessed, happy, and thankful in my life. 
There's something about having a ring on my finger and knowing that I will soon be marrying the love of my life that just changes things. It changes the way I love, it changes the way I argue express my opinions =P, and it really just changes the way I view our relationship. Everything just feels more real now, and I feel so happy in this place.

I was never one of those girls who pushed their boyfriend to get married. It's just not me, I figured when we were ready it would happen. Now we are so ready, and it's happening. Yippee.
(Side note: I may or may not have had 1 too many glasses of plum wine at a Chinese restaurant on Christmas Eve--yes I am Jewish and that is what we do hehe--and gone on a slightly drunken rant about how "it would be nice if we got engaged this year, because I'm starting to feel like it's the right time, and I even started a secret Pinterest board with wedding stuff and look I'll bring it up on my phone so you can see it Nadav....". I couldn't figure out why Nadav kept laughing at me while I was discussing my plans with him that day. Now that I know he already had the ring his laughter makes more sense =P)
(Additional side note: By "1 too many glasses of plum wine" I really just mean that I had the one and a half glasses of wine, and really it was the half that brought about the rant. **Light weight alert**)

Just feeling particularly grateful today.
Hope you are too =)
--
Wishing you the happiest of weekends :)

23 comments:

Betsy Transatlantically said...

you know, I always wonder about the progression of other people's relationships. (Yes, I'm nosy. That's why I'm a blogger? haha!) My parents met when they were 17, as freshmen in college, and got married at 24 - still young, but they'd been together for 7 years already! And Jon and I will have been together for almost 5 years when we get married. I see a lot of bloggers out there who are married who have been together for shorter (sometimes much shorter) periods of time - it clearly works for them and I'm very happy for them about that, but it's really nice and comforting to read a story that's a but more like mine. so thank you for sharing :)

much love to you both!

christin said...

I feel like I'm already married. Is that weird? My boyfriend and I have been together since we were 19 and have lived together for 3 years and share ze finances, etc. Maybe if he put a ring on it I'd be nicer? LOL. No, I totally get what you mean because now you're in forever. So happy for you two!

Katherines Corner said...

your made a commitment already with your hearts now it'll be on paper too. Sometimes, it takes a while to get to the engagement point, I wish you continued happiness Big Hugs!

Cara-Mia said...

Hahaha love that little rant. I can totally picture it and I can picture Nadav laughing at you. You two are too cute. :)

And I can't wait to be celebrating that cuteness this weekend!

Caitlin said...

This is really sweet! :) I think it's great when couples have been together for a long time before engagement! :) Although of course some like it faster. My parents knew each other for 4 months before their wedding day! And now my boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year and a half and still aren't ready for marriage! :) Every couple is different so I think it is so great to hear other's stories! :) I hope you two have a long and happy marriage! Congratulations on the engagement! :)

Treasure Tromp said...

ah, what a fantastic little rant!

Martie @ Spunkyrella said...

I am so happy for you love, thanks for sharing!

On a different note I find it so funny that American people call it "dating" even though they already live together, share an apartment or even have kids. Here it´s dating when you literally have dates but you´re not exclusive. As soon as you are you´re a couple and it´s not called dating anymore.

I loved the scene in the SATC movie where Charlotte freaks out and tells the whole restaurant that Carrie got engaged after dating Mr. Big for 10 years haha

Happy Friday!

Holly said...

Luke & I have been together for 4 years & when we get married it will 5 years of dating before marriage. And it's crazy, but we've also been together longer than most of our married friends - and I don't think Luke & I have even been together for a super long time... We went through the first two years of long distance and also kind of grew up together - both things I think really helped us grow together :)

Anyways... still so happy for you two & can't wait to see all the wedding planning - you better share on the blog :)

Betty said...

My husband and I were together for 7 years before we got engaged and I think it completely changed our relationship--for the better. I mean, I always knew he was the man I would marry but like you said...seeing that ring makes it REAL...and makes you truly see your future together.

Lindsay said...

I love this post! My husband and I started dating when we were 15. (I actually just wrote a post about that here: http://www.youaretheroots.com/2013/01/first-love-wouldnt-trade-it-for-world.html). We were long distance for one year, when he was a freshman in college and I was still a senior in high school. Then we moved in together. It was the hardest, most painful year of my life. We moved in together once I graduated. It wasn't always easy to grow up WITH someone, but I am glad for it, because it's a beautiful opportunity (I think) to do so. We were married in 2009 after getting engaged in 2007 (not that I'm such a planner-control freak I needed a 2 year engagement or anything...ahem). I think even though by the time we were married, we were already dating for 7 or so years, it was nice for everything to fall into place. I think growing up together, and growing together, is such a special thing. I'm so excited to have found your blog and to watch the wedding planning begin!

Lindsay said...

Oops, the hardest year was the long distance year! Not living with him! That sounded mean, hahahahaha.

Evani Gatsby said...

I love this post because I know EXACTLY what you mean girlfriend! Rob and I hit the 7 year mark back in November and while I've ALWAYS loved him, something about being engaged, makes me feel even MORE in love. It's such an exciting time and I've never been happier. Even though I always knew Rob and I would be together forever, something about engagement just makes me feel so much more certain about the future and more centered. I'm so happy you're going through it at the same time!

Britt said...

You and Nadav are similar to my husband and I. We dated for 10 years before we got married and have been married for 4. Clearly we started dating at a very young age (15). There is something about being married that changes things for the better. It isn't the ring or the joint bank account (if you choose), it is the level of commitment to one another. You know there is always someone there for the good and the bad. It is very comforting. Congratulations again!

holtkamp said...

how long have you guys been together? and how did you meet?! (sorry if you've already posted about this before :)

Ash said...

this just made me smile... so happy for you guys!

curiousjac said...

CONGRATS!!! And here's to booze letting you say what you really think. I had a similar situation -- I got a little tipsy on a vacation and asked "Should we look at rings when we get home?" My now-fiance agreed ... and I had no idea he had a filler ring already. (He knew I wanted to pick it out, bless him :) ) Also, I find couples who started dating when they were young such a beautiful thing. It's so sweet to grow up together. It's a kind of intimacy you simply can't have if you meet as adults. Oh, not to belittle those relationships -- my fiance and I met as adults -- but there's just this extra little something special when you've been in each others lives since before you could drink legally or drive.

Amanda k. said...

Tommy and I have been together for almost 6 years now, and people are alway asking when the wedding is. I always tell them we are in no hurry, and that we already feel like we are married, so what's the point? Haha. But deep down I know it would change things, and I know it would only be for the better. I'm so happy for you two! Can't wait to see the wedding start to take shape! :)

gina said...

so sweet. I am really happy for you!

Andi of My Beautiful Adventures said...

My hubby and I were together for 6 years before we got married! Take your time. :)

Heidi said...

I definitely know what you mean! Andrew and I were together for 8 years before we got engaged! Now we've been engaged for a little over a year and haven't even started wedding planning... apparently we take forever on EVERYTHING!

P.S. I totally loved your little rant at the end. I'm right there with you on the light weight thing. And that may happen to me more often than not considering my love of wine! ;)

Shannon said...

Congrats on the engagement!

Devon said...

I love this post. I love the way you described being engaged and the ways it has changed your communication with one another and your connection (I love that plum wine story too, lol). I remember feeling that way myself and reading this reminded me of how grateful I am for my relationship too. You guys are really sweet and I'm so happy you are so happy!

Emma said...

Oh I really enjoyed reading that lil story.. And to be honest, can't wait to hear more about your wedding plans!
I really enjoy the versatile side of your blog and really looking forward to reading new more :) xx

Emma
www.eminhapinto.blogspot.com

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